A couple of weeks ago, while I was trying to process all of this crazy heart surgery stuff, a gift arrived in the mail. This little guy is a "realistic" heart plush toy!!! I think that is he is adorable! I posted a photo to Facebook but nobody owned up to sending him to me.
My kids asked me what his name was (which I hadn't really thought about) so I named him "Pumpy". Too literal? Probably but I liked it so it has stuck.
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| Pumpy the plush toy! |
He's made by http://iheartguts.com/ and they have a huge array of toys, and gizmos for a ton of different organs.
My personal favorites are the tonsil and the colon! How awesome is that???
I can think of a bunch of people that could use a plush toy of their offending body part!!
I also bought some button badges and a heart key-ring for myself (arriving soon).
Plush toys arriving from an unknown source would probably not be something that I would normally have shrugged and said "that's awesome" except that I have so many wonderful friends that might have sent him alone out of the goodness of their hearts! I wasn't even really in search of the sender - just a little curious. Just a couple of days ago, on of my best friends messaged me and asked if I had figured out who sent the push toy and followed the question up with a 😜 HaHa! Yes I had my sender. My buddy told me that he had seen a the toy on a blog that he had been recently reading and couldn't resist sending me one. I *had* to ask more about this blog, so he explained that it was about a young scientist who found out that she had a congenital heart defect and required open heart surgery to have it corrected. Of course, I got the name and started reading!
I have to say that my blog is mostly just random crap that is floating around my brain, but https://defectiveheartgirlproblems.wordpress.com is the work of a very clever and funny lady (Summer) who approached her surgery in a not-too-dissimilar way that I am. She did a lot of research, learned about the options, asked lots of questions and blogged her journey along the way. It was a fascinating read for someone of a similar age (ok she's 5 years younger) facing down a similar surgical procedure. Reading about the run-up to her surgery is eerily familiar to my current situation and following her through the procedure, recovery, return to the civilization and the on-going challenges of dealing in a post-operative world.
There were a few bits and bobs that she shared that I have been dwelling on (more like noodling on). One thing that she said was that she was going "science the shit" out of her experience by learning as much as she could about it and applying her scientific methods and understanding to each step in the journey. The funny thing is that I had only just recently said to my wife that we needed to "project manage the shit" out of my op and recovery (and about how what assistance we'll need around the house, with the kids, etc).
Something else she mentioned that she was "fucking pissed" at her heart; that her heart had violated the trust that she had placed in it all of her life to keep her alive. In her case, her heart was slowly getting worse but she had absolutely no symptoms so she didn't have a clue that there was anything wrong (beyond being told that the had a heart murmur in the past). I had never really given much thought to my heart beyond just being a body part, but something at which I could have a semi-disconnected emotion towards. But I totally get what she was saying.
In her case, while the surgery was successful, she had some serious pain issues post-operatively and then was hit with PTSD a year and a half later, probably related to how clinical her approach to her situation had been which failed to fully embrace the emotional elements along the way. The emotional roller-coaster that she experienced ended up changing the course of her life and even made her rethink pursuing a PhD.
Summer's blog really reinforced my own thoughts and feelings about the procedure and I'm hoping to learn from her experience and really attempt to address the emotional side at the same time as the medical/physical side. In fact, a few weeks ago, I engaged a therapist to talk through my emotions with. So far we've had some good sessions. Being Irish, the idea of "getting a therapist" seemed counter-cultural. Therapists are something in Hollywood movies (who always seem to hook up with their patients after the first visit). Seemed like a good idea to me!! When I told her that my Mother had indicated some concern that I would end up in an affair, she laughed and said she had a policy of no romantic or physical relationships with her patients!!
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